I am bored with myself. And I don’t get bored very often. As a matter of fact I think there is only one sin: to find yourself boring. I remember being in highschool and talking to my brother, who was 2 grades “below” me. He didn’t watch TV. He taught himself how to draw really well (through practising) and how to write really well (through practising every day) and I just sat and watched the evening sitcoms by myself. When something funny happened I would laugh and turn to share the moment with… nobody. My brother made it really hard for me to enjoy television at home.
So I made a point of watching my favourite shows socially. Twin Peaks, Kids in the Hall– these shows would be watched with my friends. And as I learned about who killed Laura Palmer (sort of…) and how to make people laugh by “crushing your head” between my thumb and index finger, my brother was becoming a bonefide artist.
I remember being angry about his fanaticism. It was anti-social! It was annoying! It didn’t benefit my social agenda! We couldn’t talk about empty pop culture, or what Homer had done to his family this time, or what Depeche Mode was up to. If the TV was on when Mike walked by, he would actually shield his face as if to protect his mind from some kind of rotting radiation. This always pissed me off, because I took it personally.
In one rare and unforgetable moment, the two of us were in the same room talking about ‘stuff’ without the television on. I mentioned how boring something had been to me when Michael made an absolute statement that I have never forgotten: “I don’t get bored.” Of course I laughed. “Yeah right,” I chided him. I was worried. What if it was true? He proceed to explain to me how and why it wasn’t a possibility. And the more I listened, the more angry I got. And the more angry I got the more I realized he was right. And of course that made me more angry.
Boredom is caused by one’s own lack of imagination. I considered myself to have a fantastic imagination, and the idea that I could shut it off and settle for the default bugged the hell out of me. I stubbornly made a vow to never be bored again. And I have to say, it has definately worked in my favour. I’ll write more about boredom later.
Fast-forward to today. My site is just like a million other blogs: it has links to interesting things I have found on the internet. These things were found at other blogs about interesting things other people found on the internet. There is nothing going on here that actually differentiates me. I am link churn. **yawn**
This, again, bothers me. It’s like my brother is sitting beside me on the couch, and I’m itching to watch the Simpsons, and he’s just writing another amazing song with a complicated picking pattern on his guitar. He’s been practicing. He’s been creating while i’ve been consuming. That’s another thought I’ll get to later: Creators vs. Consumers. But the point is, I need to practise writing. I like writing. I feel a need to communicate. But that means I need to have personality. That means I need to create. And not be boring or bored.
I can see your eyes are glazing over, so without being too self-conscious about it, I’m going to wrap up this post by saying: there’s more to come. And I’m going to make damn sure that it’s interesting to at least one person: me.
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